This Morning Routine Will Improve Your Mood And Change Your Life, Part I
I remember all too clearly the chaos of waking up tired and late, running out the door feeling unprepared, and wondering why I never seemed to have enough hours in the day. Little did I know at the time, it had a whole lot to do with my poor boundaries and my lack of an established morning routine. I knew I needed help, so like many of us, I turned to Google, and thus began my trial and error journey to finding my PERFECT morning routine. I knew I needed help in improving my mood, and little did I know it would change my life!
Don’t worry, Im not one of those (unrelateable) people who gets up before the sun and crushes a marathon and an icebath before breakfast. It turns out, the perfect morning routine does not start at 5am. It actually starts… the evening before! Though my experience as a therapist, I have again and again found that being proactive is the cure to being reactive, and going through your day reactive and rocked back on your heals is no way to live. So, follow along for Part-1 to learn the crucial proactive first steps to a solid day. This is my solid, researched based, Nero-informed, therapist approved routine that you can begin implementing right away!
So let’s get to it. Before I go into the why’s and how’s, let me share with you my AM and PM routines, as it stands now:
Landrie’s Pre-Morning (PM) Routine
Workday Shutdown Ritual
One of the most difficult transitions for many of us is going from work to home life. We tend to carry so much tension with us and struggle to leave work… at work! In fact, I believe this phenomena contributes to poor sleep and stressful mornings. I was first introduced to a workday shutdown ritual through Michael Hyatt. A Workay Shutdown Ritual sends a powerful signal to your brain that it is allowed to “log-off”, step out of flight/fight/freeze, and enter into the rest of your day. For me, this includes reviewing the day’s events, reviewing tomorrows schedule and to-do list, closing all computer tabs, and closing my laptop as I say my “Close Down Phrase”. The close down phrase is another cue your brain will learn means, “I can finally relax!” I like the phrase “And now Im logging off, my work day is over”, but feel free to choose whatever phrase you like! I also use this time to chug some water, because let’s face it, by this point in the day Ive probably forgotten to drink water for a couple of hours. This a great time to catch up on my water intake by habit stacking with my close-down routine. (This also gives my body enough time to metabolize the water before dinner, when too water in your stomach can inhibit proper digestion.)
Complete The “Stress Response Cycle”
Now that Ive mentally and literally closed the work tabs, I need to complete the “stress response cycle” by getting some movement. I have a high energy dog waiting for me at home, so this is very easy for me to incorporate into my evening. As soon as I get home, I change shoes and head out the door to walk my dog, Nika. This has been a game changer for my mental health. Walking at the end of my work days helps my body ground and my mind and body decompress. This is a great practice for those who have families waiting at home. Many of us need a few moments to decompress so we can enter our homes and rejoin our families with a settled nervous system. While taking a walk while your little ones wait for you inside may not be practice, getting some sort of movement like push-ups or jumping jacks is crucial for your body to use up excess addrinalline accumulated throughout the day. Once we have entered a grounded state, our bodies can enter “rest and digest” state, and is ready for dinner. (To learn more about completing the stress response cycle, check out the book Burnout, by Emily Nagosaki)
Dinner
At this point, Ive decompressed mentally and emotionally, Ive caught up on my water intake, and Im ready to eat! I do my meal planning every weekend, so I already have prepared meals or ingredients and a recipe waiting for me. Cooking at home is actually a really important ritual for your health, but for more reasons than you might think. Our bodies need time to get ready for digestion, to prepare the release of particular enzymes in our saliva, and gastric juices for the proper breakdown of food in our stomachs. Experiencing the sights, sounds, and smells of food preparation gives our bodies the needed cues to breakdown our food for proper digestion once we sit down to eat. Taking a few moments to deep breathe, pray, or feel grateful is another great practice to transition to “rest and digest” mode! In terms of food, I focus on high quality protein and nutrient dense veggies in my food prep, and I take my mind/body supporting supplements at this time. If you are interested in learning more about nutrition, I suggest reaching out to Alexa Aboudaram (my sister!) at Navigating Nutrients. There is a significant connection between gut health and mental health, so this could be an important thing to explore further. Did you know serotonin is produced in the gut, and that we have neurons in our gut?! Pretty amazing.
Free Time
After dinner I may have an event to attend, or I may work on a project at home. And to be honest, that “project” is often watching the next episode of a favorite TV series! I like to pair TV with something like knitting, if I can. Protip: set your oven timer so that you have to get up at a designated time and don’t get stuck in front of the TV for hours on end! I usually set an alarm for 8pm, so that I have plenty of time to finish my evening routine and get to sleep on time.
Turn Off My Phone
A word on phone use. One of the top 5 most important changes I have made in my life in the past 10 years has been keeping electronics out of my bedroom. I could talk ad nausium about this, but let it suffice to say, it may be hard at first, but it can change your life. Around 8pm each evening I take one last scan through my calendar and texts, turn my phone to airplane mode, and plug it in to charge… in my living room. This simple practice has a massive ripple effect through so many aspects of life, from basic boundary setting skills (for you and others in your life), improved sleep, decreased anxiety (Eventually. It might get worse at first as you get used to being without your phone/emails/social media), and mental wellbeing.
Put The House To Bed
One hour before Id like to be in bed I start my “Put The House To Bed” process, which for me means washing the dishes, cleaning the kitchen, picking up around the house, and taking my dog out one last time. After putting the house to bed, I begin putting myself to bed through turning down my bed, putting a full glass of water by my bed, a skin-care routine, etc. When I remember, I may do some yoga inspired stretches before hopping into bed. Your body is about to be still for hours on end, so this can be helpful for your muscles and nervous system.
Read A Book
I like to give myself 30-45min to read in bed. I have found I enjoy reading novels at night for a few reasons. Following a storyline keeps me engaged in the book and keeps my mind off more activating topics like a self-help or non-fiction books can do. But regardless of what you read, reading is a great way to bring calm to the mind and prepare for sleep. For those who experience ruminating thoughts or anxiety, reading can bring enough focus to distract from anxious thoughts, while not being overly engaging or mentally arrousing like TV or social media. And since your aren’t exposed to harmful blue-light (because your phone is turned off and in another room), your body can release the melatonin your body requires to fall asleep!
Sleep!
Through many years of getting by on little sleep, I finally did the self examination to learn what kept me from getting more sleep. Hustle culture, low self-respect, and anxiety were some of the culprits. I eventually decided I was worth it and committed to getting not just adequate, but optimal sleep. That magic number may be different for each of us, but let me emphasis that 8 hours is the minimal amount. Im not impressed if you get 7 hours of sleep each night! In fact, one study showed than sleeping an average of less than 7hrs per night for 2 weeks lead to an 51% increase in new injury (Mileski et al. 2014). When I worked at a psychiatric hospital, poor sleep was the #1 most consistent symptom I saw in those who were admitted to the in-patient psychiatric unit. This is obviously aticdotal evidence, but I have again and again seen that you cannot be mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually healthy if you do not take care of the very basic needs of your body, aka sleep. Personally, I know I am not my best self for my friends, family, therapy clients, or myself if I do not get my personal “magic number”/optimal sleep. Watch this TedTalk on the cognative and social benefits of quality sleep.
A Few Words On Sleep Hygiene
If you are like most people I know, you may struggle with falling asleep, staying asleep, nightmares, etc. These are just a few helpful sleep practices you may consider implementing:
Use blackout curtains
Avoid sugar and caffeine after 12pm
Avoid alcohol (a significant sleep disruptor)
Take 1-5mg of melatonin (a naturally occurring hormone in supplement form)
Get early morning sunlight w/o sunglasses (this regulates your circadian rhythm)
Exersies daily (this metabolizes adrenaline and completes the stress cycle)
Take magnesium (most women are deficient!!)
Avoid screens 2+ hours before bed (this inhibits your bodies ability to create melatonin and throws off your circadian rhythm)
Listen to ASMR
Turn off wifi in your home (EMTs can disrupt sleep patterns)
Do progressive relaxation, breath work, and autogenics
Keep electronics out of your room, particularly your phone (subconsciously anticipating phone notifications can increase anxiety and disrupt sleep patterns)
Reduce stress (address the 9 areas of the wellness wheel)
Address unresolved trauma through counseling/therapy, journaling, etc
Create healthy boundaries through assertive communication with friends, family, work, and self
Begin a meditation practice
Now that we have established a solid evening routine, we are set up for a successful and supported morning!
Follow along for Part II, where I will cover a morning routine that can improve your mood, and change your life!
If you live in South Carolina and are interested in mental health counseling, you can schedule a 20min free consultation by following the link below!
