The 3 Biggest Myths About Therapy and Counseling For Women In South Carolina

The thought of getting started with therapy for the first time can be very intimidating.

You may be worried that your problems are either too small or too big. You may fear therapy is all about blaming others. Or, worse… you may fear your therapist may secretly judge you and blame you for everything!

Are you expected to cry the whole time? Does it look bad if you cry too much? The good news is that there is actually no right way to do therapy and the most important thing is that you just be yourself! Your licensed therapist is trained to help you do that and then help you move forward with your life. If you can’t be your most authentic self in therapy, then you won’t go as far! 

Three Myths About Therapy

1) You have to have a serious mental illness

I hear friends and others say all the time that what they are going through “isn’t that bad,” when they are contemplating whether or not they should start therapy. One myth around therapy is that your life has to be falling apart for you to need some sort of help. Or, that you’ve had to experience a significant trauma or disaster to be worthy of getting help. This is not true! Whether your mental health symptoms are severe, or not, therapy is available to help you grow and change. If you keep getting stuck in the same patterns, (like avoiding conflict or “overreacting” to the same problem again and again), if you feel like your self-worth isn’t what it should be, or if you’re constantly turning to binging tv or having an extra glass of wine instead of doing something healthy for yourself, then therapy is a great option for you! 

Therapy is now more strength based and has a heightened awareness of wellness, relationships, and optimal growth. This means that therapy isn’t dependent on a mental health diagnosis to get treatment (diagnoses can be helpful, but they may not be necessary!). It’s a brave step to get therapy even if you don’t feel like your life is falling apart. Starting therapy can feel scary- but, that’s what your therapist is there for! They can help you move through it!

2) Therapy is for getting great advice

The most common myth I’ve seen first-time therapy clients falling victim to is the idea that they should go to therapy to get great advice. Along with this belief, they expect their therapist to be doing all of the talking, leading, teaching, and advice giving. However, the reality is that you will and should be doing most of the talking and your therapist will help you understand yourself better so you can be empowered to make your own decisions for your life.  Therapists are trained to actively listen to clients to help reflect what the client is experiencing. This process helps clients to better understand themselves, their needs, their goals, and their shortcomings. This requires the client to do a lot of the talking and sometimes leading in session as well. 

The more the therapist understands you, the more they can provide insight, interventions, and education to help you move forward. Education and intervention isn’t typically the first step of therapy. Instead, the first few sessions usually have a lot to do with them getting to know you the best that they can so they can then work with you to help you move forward. The closest thing a client typically gets to “advice” is some psychoeducation around coping, communicating, and managing trauma and the nervous system. But, when it comes to advice on what you do with your life, it’s a lot more empowering, and the change is a lot more long lasting, when therapy helps you begin making those decisions yourself. 

3) You have to find the “perfect fit”

It’s great news that therapy is becoming less stigmatized and more people are reaching out to start therapy. This means that more therapists are becoming available in big and small cities, alike. However, within this trend, a new myth around therapy has developed that encourages “shopping around” for your therapist to “find the perfect fit.” Unfortunately, the myth of the “perfect fit” sometimes keeps clients from being able to accept their therapist and open up in the therapy room. Then, they quit therapy early on, or go on an endless search to find this ideal match, and they never end up getting the benefits that come from therapy. Many therapists specialize in certain issues or with certain populations. This may help guide your search and help you find a “good fit”, but the idea that there is a “perfect fit” is a myth. 

The therapeutic relationship is an integral part of every therapy session. This means that the therapist will use intentional skills to make you feel more comfortable and less judged. The therapeutic relationship helps provide a safe and secure connection that will support your optimal growth. Your therapist is a unique person! They need to be that person in order to successfully build the therapeutic relationship. The therapist that helps you achieve your goals might not be exactly what you imagined or expected, but you will be so glad that you gave them a chance.

If you are interested in learning more about how counseling or therapy can help you, schedule a free 15 min consultation with a licensed professional therapist by following the link below!