TW: Self-harm, Suicide, Depression

If you need immediate help, call the national suicide hotline at 988 now

I don’t think you’re selfish, I think you’re hurting.

The dark cloud may have taken over everything. This feels like more than what you know about anxiety or depression.

You can’t think straight or even picture a life past tomorrow.

It feels like there is no way out or any way that things could possibly get better. You’ve reached the point where it doesn’t feel like there’s a place or hope for your life on this earth.

You’ve been plagued with constant thoughts of suicide, death, or dying.

Even if you don’t actually want to hurt yourself, you can’t help but think that it would just be easier if you could fall asleep and never wake up.

You may have experienced recent losses, be riddled with shame about the past, or fear about the future.

You try to come up with ways to get rid of the dark cloud throughout the day. But it's still there at work, or when you binge netflix, or after you scroll tiktok, and definitely after you wake up from a night of drinking.

It’s terrifying and exhausting and it feels way too scary to talk about with anybody. Or, you may have tried to tell someone, but the person you wanted to trust didn’t respond in the way you wanted. Now, you feel betrayed and disappointed, on top of everything else.

Suicidal thoughts come when we feel like there is no other way out to escape the pain or situation that we are in. Suicidal thoughts seem like the answer or escape rout to set you free, and it’s helpful to remember that the most intense moments of feeling suicidal are usually in response to crises or depressive episodes.

This means the waves of urgency can pass and there is hope and warmth on the other side of that sheet of pure darkness.

Through therapy, we can work on reducing feelings of shame and guilt, move through grief and loss, explore purpose and lifestyle choices that are congruent with your true self. We can take things day by day, or week by week until you are back on your feet, able to see a future, and can live and thrive.

You may or may not need more urgent or inpatient care to get you to safety and stability, but individual therapy is there for you upon your return. 

For those who are getting close to it

Your fight against the darkness has become too much, but something has prevented you from giving up your life. You deserve to stay safe until this moment passes. You’re worthy of receiving help that will support you as you heal.

For those who have attempted 

I am so glad you are still here. Everything became too much and you couldn’t take it anymore, but you are here and that means there’s still hope. Whether you feel gratitude, shame, regret, or more fear after your attempt, you don’t have to feel that alone. And we can work together to keep you moving forward.

For those who feel like you never could or would 

I’m sorry you have to suffer through the thoughts nonetheless. Suicidal thoughts or thoughts wishing you could go to heaven or fall asleep and never wake up are telling you that something feels wrong. We can find out how to make things right to feel like your life is worth living. 

For those who I didn’t describe, but still struggle with thoughts of suicide 

You are worthy. You deserve to feel seen and understood. You deserve to be supported. 

If your safety or livelihood is immediately at risk because of your suicidal thoughts, and you need help to keep yourself safe please call 988, the suicide hotline, or mobile crisis if you are in Charleston at (843)414-2350. These resources can help you explore your options to keep yourself safe and wait for this moment or episode to pass. 

“Upon your position of safety, I would be honored to work with you and continue with you on your journey further.”

- Dr. Etta Gantt, PhD, LPC, NCC