How To Decide Between Individual Therapy and Couples Therapy in Charleston, South Carolina

Deciding Between Couples Therapy and Individual Therapy

One of the first questions that arises when relationships are struggling is whether to pursue couples therapy or individual therapy. Each option has its own advantages and is suited to different situations.

Understanding which form of therapy is best for you can make a significant difference in the effectiveness of the treatment. This article will explore the factors to consider when deciding between couples therapy and individual therapy, helping you make an informed choice.

What is Couples Counseling and What is Individual Therapy?

Couples Therapy:

Couples therapy involves both partners in a relationship working together with a therapist. The primary focus is on the relationship itself, exploring dynamics, communication patterns, shared experiences, and how each partner’s past is triggered in the present dynamic. The goal is to improve the relationship, resolve conflicts, and foster a deeper understanding and connection between partners.

Individual Therapy:

Individual therapy, on the other hand, is a one-on-one session with a therapist. The focus is on the individual's experiences, thoughts, and feelings. This form of therapy helps individuals work through personal issues, mental health challenges, trauma this is making functioning difficult, and personal development goals.


When Should I Consider Couples Therapy?

1. Persistent Relationship Issues:

Couples therapy is particularly beneficial when you and your partner are experiencing ongoing conflicts or dissatisfaction in your relationship. This could include issues like communication problems, trust issues, or recurring arguments. If these problems seem insurmountable or have persisted for a long time, couples therapy can help address them in a structured environment.

2. Lack of Communication:

One of the most common reasons couples seek therapy is a breakdown in communication. If you and your partner find it difficult to express your feelings or discuss important matters without it leading to conflict, couples therapy can provide tools and strategies to improve communication. A therapist can help both partners learn to listen more effectively and express themselves in ways that are constructive rather than destructive.

3. Infidelity or Betrayal:

Infidelity can be one of the most challenging issues a couple can face. Couples therapy is essential in these situations, as it provides a safe space to address the pain, rebuild trust, and decide on the future of the relationship. A therapist can guide the couple through the difficult emotions and decisions that follow an affair, helping them to either repair the relationship or part ways amicably.

4. Life Transitions:

Major life transitions, such as getting married, having a child, illness, or entering retirement can put a strain on a relationship. Couples therapy can help partners navigate these changes by addressing fears, expectations, and adjusting to new roles. Therapy can provide support as the couple works together to maintain their connection during these transitions.

5. Desire for a Stronger Relationship:

Sometimes, couples therapy isn’t about resolving major issues but rather about enhancing an already good relationship! Couples may seek therapy to strengthen their bond, improve their emotional connection, or develop better communication skills. This proactive approach can prevent future conflicts and ensure a healthier relationship for the long haul.

When to Consider Individual Therapy

1. Personal Mental Health Issues:

If you are struggling with mental health issues such as OCD, trauma, anxiety, or stress, individual therapy may be the best option. These issues often need to be addressed on a personal level before they can be effectively dealt with in the context of a relationship. Individual therapy provides a space to focus solely on your own mental and emotional well-being.

2. Self-Exploration and Personal Growth:

Individual therapy is ideal if you are seeking personal growth, self-exploration, or a deeper understanding of yourself. Whether you are dealing with issues from your past, trying to improve your self-esteem, or working on personal goals, individual therapy can offer the guidance and support you need.

3. Confidentiality Concerns:

There are times when an individual might not feel comfortable sharing certain thoughts or feelings in front of their partner. If you have issues that are deeply personal or you’re not ready to discuss them in a couple’s setting, individual therapy can provide the privacy and confidentiality necessary to work through these concerns.

4. Relationship Ambivalence:

If you’re unsure about whether you want to stay in a relationship, individual therapy can help you clarify your feelings. A therapist can assist you in exploring your thoughts, emotions, and options without the pressure of making a decision in front of your partner. This can be particularly important if you feel stuck or conflicted about the future of the relationship.

5. Personal Accountability:

Sometimes, relationship issues stem from individual behaviors or patterns that need to be addressed separately. If you recognize that your own actions or attitudes are contributing to relationship problems, individual therapy can help you take responsibility and make changes that can benefit both you and your relationship.

When to Combine Couples and Individual Therapy

There are situations where combining both couples and individual therapy can be the most effective approach. For example:

  1. Complex Issues:

If both partners have individual mental health concerns in addition to relationship issues, working on both simultaneously can be beneficial. Individual therapy allows each partner to focus on personal growth, while couples therapy addresses the relationship dynamics.

2. Dealing with Trauma:

When past trauma affects the relationship, individual therapy can help the affected partner process their trauma, while couples therapy can address how it impacts the relationship.

3. Personal Growth with Relationship Support:

Sometimes, one partner may want to work on personal development, while the other wants to improve the relationship. In such cases, individual therapy can support personal growth, and couples therapy can ensure that the relationship remains strong and supportive.


How to Decide Which Therapy is Right for You

Making the decision between couples therapy and individual therapy depends on your unique situation. Here are some questions to ask yourself:

1. What is the primary issue?

If the primary issue is within the relationship, couples therapy might be more appropriate. If the issue is personal and internal, individual therapy could be the better choice.

2. Are you both willing to participate and put everything on the table?

Couples therapy requires both partners to be willing participants. If one partner is unwilling or resistant, individual therapy might be a more viable starting point.

3. What are your goals?

Consider what you hope to achieve through therapy. If your goal is to improve your relationship, couples therapy is the way to go. If your goal is personal healing or growth, individual therapy will be more beneficial.

4. Do you need a safe space to explore personal issues?

If you feel the need to explore certain issues without your partner's involvement, individual therapy may be necessary. This can be especially important if you’re dealing with sensitive topics like trauma or self-esteem issues.


Choosing between couples therapy and individual therapy is a deeply personal decision that depends on your unique circumstances and goals. Both forms of therapy offer valuable benefits, and in some cases, a combination of both may be the most effective approach. The key is to assess your needs honestly and communicate openly with your partner (if applicable) about the best path forward. Remember, seeking therapy is a positive step toward healing, growth, and a healthier future, whether you do it together or individually.


If you are interested in learning more about how counseling or therapy can help you, schedule a free 15 min consultation with a licensed professional therapist by following the link below!

Landrie Ethredge, MA, LPC, CCTP

Landrie is the owner and founder of Ethredge Counseling Group, located on James Island, South Carolina.

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